Are You Holding Yourself Back?


What if I told you that you already have the tools you need to become the best version of you?

Everything you need is already within your possession, and if things aren’t going as well as you hoped, you only have yourself to blame.

Would you believe me?

Would you also believe me if I told you that it is never too late to make the changes you want to see? That it is never too late to find those tools and get to work?

Let me tell you a quick story.

When I was younger I loved to play basketball. I had a killer shot and I played shooting guard. I even had a play named after me called "Tres." Spanish for three, because shooting three-pointers was my specialty.

I was so in love with basketball that every summer my sister and I would sign up for a 10,000 shot challenge, where the goal for the summer was to shoot 10,000 baskets in a summer. Like most challenges I took this one seriously, and we often competed to see who would get to 10,000 shots first.

Every day we would go outside and shoot baskets until our arms were numb and sore. 

Every day we practiced, taking it one day at a time, and every summer we reached that 10,000 shot goal.

When high school started I couldn't wait to try out for the basketball team. I made the freshman team, loved my coach, and loved my team. 

Life was good. 

The first game of the season started and I couldn't wait to get out there. I wasn't a starter but expected I would play a decent amount.

First quarter, second quarter, third quarter went by and I still hadn't played one second.

Finally, at the end of the 4th quarter, with 10 seconds remaining, my name gets called. At that point I didn't even want to play. I mean, how embarrassing?!

I spent the whole bus ride home sitting in the back by myself talking to no one.

I was so mad. I felt so dumb, and the negative thoughts about myself were running wild in my head.

When I got home I was so upset. I remember talking to my dad about it.

"Do you want me to say something to your coach about it?"

"No dad, just leave it alone. I'm quitting, this is stupid."

"Do you still enjoy playing basketball?"

"What do you mean? Of course I do! I love it!"

The next thing he said to me has stuck with me over the years...

"If you love it so much then why would you quit? Because you didn't play? You have two choices here Taylor. You can either quit and walk away from the game, or you can get back to practice and work harder than anyone else so your coach doesn't have a choice but to put you in. You decide. But stop complaining, because no one wants someone who is just worried about herself, not the team."

I decided to go back to practice, and for the next month I made sure I ran faster than everyone, shot better than everyone, stayed more positive than everyone, and worked harder than anyone else on the team. One month later I became a starter and was eventually recognized as a leader and encouraged by my coach to speak with younger girls about the power of positive thinking and hard work.

This moment was a defining moment for me. I still think about it often when I'm faced with a new challenge, or I find myself complaining about a situation I don't like.

This is just one of the many stories I have from my life of situations I've faced where the options included working harder to get what I wanted, or to decide if the dream wasn't worth it, and if it wasn't, to stop complaining about it.

In every situation, the turnaround started with me. In order to change the situation, I had to first change the internal dialogue I had with myself. I had to stop complaining and stop beating myself up.

Do you have something that you want to change in your life? Something in your relationships or maybe your career? Maybe you’re trying to make healthier choices and eat better, or exercise more?

Whatever the change is, it starts first with you and your thoughts.

You have the power and tools to change your life. 

Ask yourself, are YOU holding yourself back?

In this week’s video, I offer up three tips for improving your self-talk.

Don't wait another day, watch this week’s episode and decide TODAY which tip you can start TODAY to change your inner dialogue and eventually, change your life.

On a personal note, I'm home in Wisconsin for the next two weeks. Spending some much needed time with friends and family back home along with some wedding planning and cheese eating :-) A dream come true!

A friendly reminder for my friends in NYC, my next class will be on Sunday, August 28th at 11 AM - make sure to click HERE to sign up! Hope to see you there and I encourage you to bring a friend!
With so much gratitude,

P.S. Have a friend or family member who might benefit from this week’s video? Forward them this email and share the love!